Published On: Sun, Jan 20th, 2013

Never Play With Sniffer Dogs – Confessions of a Drug Dealer

“I’ve always been interested in business and the drug industry is the easiest to get started in and make decent money straight away.  Pity it’s illegal.”


So we’ve been getting some electronic abuse regarding the Heroin article – mainly, that all we did was go on a pub crawl with a recovering heroin addict, and that we didn’t really get to grips with the drug regarding prices and stuff. One guy was so angry he agreed to do an interview. People deal with rage differently, I guess…


What did you sell?

I’ve stopped now, but I used to sell weed.

Did you smoke a lot?

Yeah, at the time of selling in particular I smoked loads cus it was all free for me and I didn’t have to worry about it costing me money.  I suppose I would’ve made more money selling it though if I didn’t smoke at all.

What came first – the dealing or the habit?

I never said I had a habit!  I hate that word… but yeah, I used to smoke a fair amount of weed and started buying it in bulk and selling it to subsidise the cost. Yeah you could probably say I had a habit then.  At first I was happy to break even and just get a free smoke for myself but then I saw the opportunity to make a lot of money so I got a bit entrepreneurial. It was a total buzz when I got to the end of a really good week and had made a fuck-ton of cash.

Was it something you felt you had to do or wanted to do?

It was more something I wanted to do.  Im a student with a decent enough part time job and from a good family so it was hardly like I was moving green to feed starving kids or any of that shit.  Ive always been interested in business and the drug industry is the easiest to get started in and make decent money straight away.  Pity its illegal.

What sort of mark-up were you making?

I’d buy a half kilo for around £2000 depending on market price at the time and sell it in a week, bringing in £2800, so £800 profit.  It depends on the size of the bags I sold though cus I’d give people a discount the more they bought.  To put it in perspective, if I was selling a student a £20 bag, that bag would’ve cost me about £14 so markup was £6 on every eighth.


What drugs have you done?

Weed obviously, plus MDMA, Coke and magic truffles….. oh and I once accidentally tried Meth.

Meth?!  How did you do that ‘accidentally’?!

I thought it was coke…. Then after trying it thought it was really really really good coke!  Turned out later it was half coke, half meth.  Pretty mental but probably one of the best nights of my life.

Is weed a gateway?

Nah not at all.  Someone looking to smoke weed and chill and eat junk food is not going to go from that to smashing class A drugs and going mental at raves and stuff.  There are many who do both out of coincidence or whatever but there are plenty of stoners who never touch class A’s and vice versa as well.

Why did you stick to weed and not sell harder stuff?

Purely because of the legal implications of getting caught.  If you get caught selling class A’s you can go to prison and shit.  Weed has a lighter sentence because it’s a class B.  The profit margins on class A’s are much bigger though, and if they were less illegal to sell, I’d be all over it!

Who was your clientèle, anyone interesting?

To be honest, not really.  The market for selling weed is predominantly students and people who like to chill out.  One of my customers was a 50 year old head of department lecturer from one of the local universities who used to buy a lot.  He gave me great business and I was always discreet when dropping off his delivery in his office, so we had a mutually respectful dealer-client relationship.

What’s the dealer/client relationship like, do they all want to be your mate?

Yeah, you get a lot of kids trying to act all cool and others who are terrified by the fact that they are talking to a dealer – mixed bag really.

Did you ever get arrested?

I had a close call at T in the park when I got caught with weed and MDMA on me.  I only got done for possession though, not dealing or intent to supply.  Thank fuck.

How’d they catch you?

I was breaking shapes in one of the tents, out my face on all sorts, when through the crowd this dog just appears. I started playing with it and shit, the little bastard was a sniffer dog, cuffed yo.

What’s your opinions on the laws on drugs?

From an outside point of view, weed should be legal to consume but not deal.  In Barcelona they have a great model in that 2 plants being grown per household is legal.  This stops dodgy dealings as those who want to smoke no longer need to buy it, they can grow their own.

There are proven direct links with marijuana and psychotic disorders. Discuss.

I don’t think there are to be honest.  Nothing is 100% proven, I’ve looked into this and there’s a lot of speculation.  Alcohol is one of the worst drugs going, far worse than weed and no one makes as big a fuss about that because its part of our society.  All chemicals which alter they way we feel are bad for us but anything is fine in moderation – apart from the really grim stuff like smack etc.  I say we’re here for a good time, not a long time so we should enjoy ourselves while we’re young and get as smashed as we possibly can.  Worry about being spoon fed and having our arses wiped by a nurse in the future, now is not the time to fret about that shit.

Hitchens says that weed is the worst drug due to the long term mental health issues. What’s your view on that?

Hitchens sounds like a bawbag. Like I said, information like that has never been confirmed.  Besides, even if that was true, I think a junkie stabbing and robbing someone so they can buy another hit is a bit worse than a stoner getting high and becoming a bit forgetful in their twighlight years. Worst drug?!  Get a grip!

Do you think it’ll ever be legalised?

It should be, but I can’t really see it going that way unless we get a government in the future that sees sense.  You’d probably see a lower number of users if it was legalised as well as it would take away the rebellious factor for kids wanting to try it.  In places like Amsterdam where it’s semi-legal, weed is seen as ‘no big deal’ because it’s everywhere and has less of an appeal to young locals than it does here.  I would suggest the legal model in Barcelona would be pretty effective here.  Coffeeshops etc like they have in Amsterdam would be a bit much for the British public to handle though.

Do you think dealing is a good way to make some fat stacks?

Oh for sure!  To be honest, and this might sound bad, but I’d highly recommend it to anyone.  It’s the only industry in the world where it’s extremely saturated but there’s still always room for one more dealer.  I only did it for about 6 months and made thousands within that time, probably somewhere between £10-20,000 and I was a first year student.  The only reason I stopped was for fear of getting caught.  My recommendation would be to sell a lot in a very short time then quit and count your stacks, don’t get greedy and see it as a long term career option because fate would eventually get you arrested and you’d end up being Gaddafi’d every day in the prison showers.

If you got the opportunity to set up a ‘Breaking Bad’ meth lab, would you?

Yeah! I love that show and have at many times thought it was inspirational to wannabe meth dealers.  If I could get away with that and make the kind of money they make then I would!



The fact of the matter is, that if you are caught dealing any class of drug, you can go to jail for a very long time. Your assets can also be seized, meaning that not only will you see jail time but you’ll lose your skanky bird when your house and car are repossessed. Hard-Copy does not condone the use or distribution of any illegal narcotics.


Also, we used an actor for the pictures.


Chris Pettigrew