Published On: Thu, Jul 18th, 2013

“Tom from Myspace came to my house for a cup of tea and a chat”



Do you recognise this man? Familiar, isn’t he? Who is that? A former colleague? That guy from your high school with the congenital heart disease? A one-night stand who you had awkward missionary sex with and then didn’t exchange phone numbers? You know him from somewhere.

That’s because this man is Tom Anderson, co-founder of Myspace, and default friend for millions of users the world over. If you set up an account on Myspace, like it or not, Tom Anderson was automatically your first friend. Since you’ve probably finished high school by now and no longer listen to Simple Plan it’s unlikely that you still have an active account on Myspace, but motherfuckers act like they forgot about Tom.

He caught the attention of Hard Copy when he showed up unannounced at the flat of local accountant Heather Tweed, 26, from Partick, for a “catch up”, declaring “they hadn’t hung out in like, forever”.

“At first I thought he was my brother’s friend. He just sort of lingered at the front door for ages before I let him in,” began Miss Tweed, “It only dawned on me who he actually was after I’d invited him in for a cup of tea, he was really friendly. He said he was in the area and thought he’d look me up, but to be honest, he seemed desperate for company. We chatted about my friend’s old band who split up in 2005, and we looked at pictures of my cat, Jezebel.”

“She’s been dead since 2007.” she added.

“Tom was actually very nice,” reported Tweed, “As he was on his way out I told him I’d add him on Facebook. He just did this sad little nod and then he was on his way. I felt awful. I suppose it was good seeing him after all those years. I don’t think I ever thought of him as a real person.”

Heather Tweed is thought to be the latest in a string of former Myspace users who have been revisited by a lonely Tom Anderson. Although her experience was harmless, several others claim that their encounters with Anderson have been pointless and creepy, with him coming across as overly needy.

Be on your guard. Anderson has been known to try and start conversations with strangers at the pub, and has been spotted loitering at various shopping centres across the country, starved for conversation. Do not make eye contact.